SamEpisco

A tough day

Hi gang.  I just wanted to check in with everyone.  Its been a tough day with the awful events at Virginia Tech.  I thought it might be a good idea to do a brief post on the blog.  Sometimes when things happen on other college campuses, it can seem to hit close to home even if its not our college, or a college where we have friends or not.  I am not sure why that is, it just is sometimes.  Maybe its because when you are in college, away from home, the safety net seems a little stretched thin. 

How are you feeling about today?

When horrific events happen right in front of us, (and with the immediacy of news coverage everything seems to happen right in front of us regardless of where it happens), we are brought face to face with the brokenness of our world.  There is so much capacity for love, and goodness, in the world, and in all of humanity, that it just doesn't make sense when such brokenness manifests itself, causing fear, pain, and hurt. 

But, even in the darkest moments, we have the promise found in  the beginning of John's Gospel, "The light shall always overcome the darkness." 

There is  a prayer in the Prayer Book (page 815), For the Human Family:

O God, you made us in your own image and redeemed us through Jesus your Son:  Look with compassion on the whole human family; take away the arrogance and hatred which infect our hearts; break down the walls that separate us; unite us in bonds of love; and work through our struggle and confusion to accomplish your purposes one earth; than, in your good time, all nations and races may serve you in harmony around your heavenly throne, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen

We should also keep in our prayers the students who were killed, and their families. 

We should hold the other students and faculty at Virginia Tech in prayer as well.

Tell me how you are doing.

Holy Saturday

Waiting, waiting, and waiting . . . .
That's what I think today is about.
Sometimes we wait in fear, sometimes we wait in anxiety, and doubt, and worry.
All those seem to be in play today.

Its snowing hard here today and last night.  It makes this time seem so different, framing this week, and Easter is some unfamiliar ways. 

But, we will still wait.

I wonder if you are waiting for anything?

Here is today's mediation.

HOLY S ATURDAY

Read John 19:38–42

Now there was a garden in the place where he was crucified, and in the garden

there was a new tomb in which no one had ever been laid. And so, because it

was the Jewish day of Preparation, and the tomb was nearby, they laid Jesus

there.

When someone you love dies, you operate automatically. You do the

things you do everyday, eat your breakfast, go to work or school, do the

laundry. You try to make the world seem normal when it feels anything

but that. Imagine the grieving family and friends of Jesus, caught in the

deep despair of night, the tension of lost hope keeping them from knowing

what to care about. They search for answers from God and find only

silence. The tomb is before them, the mystery of God's ways beyond

them. They cry with the Psalmist, "Where are you, my God?" They seek

God's face in the touch of others and yet they walk through their day

after watching Jesus die, in agony, with no clarity. They are still because

they are frozen in pain.

We sit still today, thinking of them, staring off into space. We do

not need to ask for help in sitting still when we are covered in the fog of

grief. In this stillness we listen for God, wondering how we will go

beyond loss.

Lord, teach me to sit still.

I am listening, Lord, for _______________________________________

Good Friday

My 8 year old daughter came into church with me this morning to hang out, about an hour ago she asked me, "Daddy, what's so good about Good Friday?"  Its a great question, one I wonder about from time to time.  So, I sent her around the building asking priests, staff, parishioners, the same question, we got a variety of answers:

    "Its good because the sacrifice of Jesus was for us."

    "Go ask your dad, he supposed to know that kind of stuff!"

    "We say 'good', but really it means 'God Friday'"

    "Its good because we know that after his death, there will be his resurrection."

    "Its good because kids don't have school so they can sleep in!" (that was her favorite one)

Not everyone will agree with me on this, but frankly, I don't think its that important that she get "THE" right answer to her question, especially as an 8 year old.  What I said to her was, "Let's go ask a bunch of people, and then I want to hear what you think."  For her at 8, and even me at 37, I think the best part is working that spiritual muscle of even thinking about the implications of "What is so good about Good Friday?"  We can find out all the historical, theological answers, and we should, and its good to do that.  But, if we stop there, and not think about what it means for us, then really, what's the point?

For me, though, on this Good Friday, good has taken a whole new meaning.  What's so good about Good Friday this year is having my daughter with me all day in the midst of setting stuff up, and preparing for all the ways in which we observe the Tridium of Maundy Thursday, Good Friday, and Holy Saturday.  Having her with me is making me pay attention to why I am doing what I am doing.

I wonder, why do you do what you do?  Have you ever thought about it?

Here is the today's meditation:

   

GOOD F RIDAY

Read Mark 15:40–47

There were also women looking on from a distance; among them were Mary

Magdalene, and Mary the mother of James the younger and of Joses, and

Salome…Then Joseph bought a linen cloth, and taking down the body,

wrapped it in the linen cloth, and laid it in a tomb that had been hewn out of

the rock.

The dark chasm of death feels like you have been hit in the stomach.

Whether or not you have yet experienced the loss of someone close to

you, you know someone who has, or have read stories about the intensity

of such loss. My mother died the year after I graduated from college.

The stab of her death was swift and strong, unexpected. The darkness

that filled my life for a long time following that death gives me a

glimpse of what it must have been like for those close to Jesus—those

who watched him die and who found the pain too great to bear and left

the scene, or for those who stayed with the pain, weeping at the foot of

the cross.

I believe any response is appropriate, because there is an honesty

in grief this deep. All is lost. Imagine for the disciples and those close to

Jesus that the loss of a friend, brother, son, was a personal, intimate loss.

And yet even more was at the heart of their grief—the lost hope that the

promise of God was to be fulfilled. Remember, at the foot of the cross,

those who loved Jesus could not know that Easter was to come. All is

black and darkness. The soul is still, grieved, lost, without hope.

Lord, teach me to sit still.

I am listening, Lord, for _______________________________________

 

Maundy Thursday

There is a lot that we remember that happened on that Thursday before Jesus is crucified, and I think all of it is still about love.  Sometimes its easy to see where the love is, sometimes its hard, but a lot happens that we remember:
Jesus shares in his last supper with his friends,
he washes their feet,
he give them a New Commandment "Love each other as I have loved you",
he prays for them and himself in his fear and confusion in the Garden of Gethsemenee even as his friends are so tired they can't stay awake for him,
he is betrayed, and he is taken away.

Even when it is least apparent, it still is all about love.

Here is the meditation for Maundy Thursday from the resource "Sitting Still" by Lois McCullen Parr and Erin Brown.  I really have love these meditations, and I hope you all are finding them meaningful and challenging as well.

MAUNDY T HURSDAY

Read Luke 11:1–4

He was praying in a certain place, and after he had finished, one of his

disciples said to him, "Lord, teach us to pray, as John taught his disciples."

Read Matthew 26:36–45

…he said to them, "I am deeply grieved, even to death; remain here, and stay

awake with me." And going a little farther, he threw himself on the ground and

prayed, "My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me; yet not what I

want but what you want."

Jesus asked the disciples to retreat with him in prayer at Gethsemane ...

he knew to withdraw, even though they did not come with him, did not

stay awake. But why did he ask them? Even Jesus did not want to be

alone with God on this night.

Can we find comfort in that when we fear being alone with God?

What are we fearing—certainly nothing as great as Jesus did, knowing

what was to come. "Take this cup away from me," our Lord asked God.

What are we most afraid to utter to God in our alone time? That we are

in pain? That we are lost? That we are afraid? That we do not know what

to say? That we are overwhelmed? That even when we are trying to listen,

we do not hear God's voice?

Lord, teach me to sit still.

I am listening, Lord, for _______________________________________ 

The Final Wednesday of Lent

Here we are in Holy Week, and tomorrow, we begin the Tridium, or the 3 Holy Days of Maundy Thursday, Good Friday, and Holy Saturday that prepare and open us up, through the story of Jesus, for the joy of new life.  I think I will break the once a week rule, and send quick mediations for each of the next three days, and then one on Easter as well.  This is the last week of the College Lenten  Blogsite Bible study.  I hope  I hear from many of you who have been checking it out, even if you haven't posted.  We broke 300 hits last week, and it looks like 30-40 of you check it out weekly.  I would love to hear your thoughts.  We will probably crank it up again in Advent, and I hope to just shoot out an email to you all once a month in the in between times.  How does that sound to you?

Last week we had two remarkable comments on the reflection, I hope you go check them out.  I was actually struck by how similar they are, and they both arrived in my mailbox within minutes of one another.  The first was from a 1st year student at an east coast college, and the second is from a senior at a west coast college. 

I wonder where you all will be during these Holy Week days?  Are you thinking about slipping into the back of some church on Maundy Thursday and Good Friday?  You might be surprised what you find.  If you do go, I would love to hear about it.  Also, tell me what your plans are for Easter!  Even if you don't have any plans, I wonder if you are home, at school, or on vacation.  Let me know!

Here is this week's meditation:

WEDNESDAY

Read Mark 1:35–39

 

In the morning, while it was still very dark, he got up and went out to a

deserted place, and there he prayed.

Jesus knew the power of taking time for oneself, taking time to withdraw.

We all wear watches, have clocks, check to see how quickly the

day is slipping by. When the lecture hour is dull, the time drags along.

When we're on vacation, it is lunchtime and then dinnertime before

we know it—how did that happen? I visited London for the first time

last summer and began to read Eliot in a new way because I experienced

tea-time. The graceful and lovely habit of taking tea in the afternoon

in London is a time when people sit and talk together, or sit

alone, slowing down to sip hot tea. With this deliberate, intentional,

scheduled rest in the midst of the day, I more easily understood Eliot's

fascination with time:

because I know that time is always time

and place is always and only place

And what is actual is actual only for one time

And only for one place…

 

Lord, teach me to sit still…
I am listening, Lord, for _______________________________________